Ark: Survival Evolved

2025-01-17
Ark gets 1 star for possessing a character creator that can only create what I would term Meat Monstrosities. Hulking, deformed, muscled men who look like they escaped from some vat in fucking Chernobyl. They are in short: the ultimate lads. Everything else in Ark is shit. Barebones crafting and survival that is grindy as allll hell and genuinely--I shit you not--wasn't even fun with friends. Everything is fun with friends. Except Ark. I mean look at that cover art: "Holy SHIT a robot dinosaur? Let's go!" you exclaim to yourself. But no even after I played for close to 6 hours and I didn't get to ride a single dinosaur. I think maybe we tamed one. And it wasn't fun. Why make the front cover feature--the only cool part of your game--this far fetched goal with a bunch of bullshit beforehand? I dunno go ask Vin Diesel or whatever. Just don't play Ark.

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Funish Rust-like crafting game with friends. Pretty barebones. Only real carrot is being able to ride dinos. But it's a grind in a pretty barren world. Wouldn't recommend unless you're playing with friends.