Wilmot's Warehouse

2025-12-17
I do like that it's called "Wilmot's Warehouse" even though he's just an employee of the warehouse. That'd be like when I worked at Best Buy as a kid I called it Trash's Best Buy. Bit delusional methinks you is, ol' Wilmot.

This is a game about moving boxes. Or really, about organizing boxes. You're given a limited amount of space, a bunch of boxes covered in ambiguous little symbols, and must organize them. You must organize them because at some point you'll get an order for 3 of the banana and 4 of the line chart, and 5 of--uh is that a mushroom? Yes, let's call it a mushroom--5 of the mushroom. Then due to your unmatched cerebral might you'll immediately recall where you diligently and methodically stored each of these things into nice orderly groups and bring them to the ol' delivery box in a jiff.

Or at least that's what you hope. The true genius of the game is in the ambiguity of the patterns on each box and how unrelated they often are from each other. You might start with a group that's fruits but then you get a shoe. Well, I don't fucking have a category for shoes. Well I got uhh a stapler and gun. Ok stapler, gun, and shoe arrrrre "office supplies"! Sure, makes sense to me. Let's move those over to the bottom left corner! In a way it plays out like a game of Codenames where you must create ever-evolving and increasingly vague categorizations. Don't go too specific with your categories because inevitably a wrench will be thrown in the works. Or is that a pickaxe?

The joy comes from the time pressure to organize and find these things lickity-split such that you'll always end up with these fucked up idiosyncratic taxonomies of objects. No game plays out the same, even for the same person, nevermind another person. If I showed you my warehouse I think you'd categorize me under "schizophrenics".

All in all a delightful little puzzly organization game. Cheers to you, Wilmot. Just stop calling it your warehouse you little square freak.