Super Mario Sunshine

2025-04-20
Super Mario Sunshine is a game where Mario goes to jail for eco-terrorism in the beginning and then spends the rest of the game ruining Bowser's family vacation. But we're not here for the story, we're here for the island vibes and the buggy ass platforming. On the first count the vibes are pristine. It is a terrifically gorgeous game, all bright colors and open spaces and filled with Nintendo's immaculate character design in that perfect GameCube era 3D modeling. Ah and the music pulls from a whole host of Carribbean and Hawaiian themes with steel drums, ukelele, and a sprinkling of big latin jazz piano. And if it were for the vibes alone I think Sunshine wouldn't have as maligned of a rep (for a Mario game) as it does.

Let's get this out of the way: Sunshine is buggy as hell for a Nintendo game. Mario loves clipping through objects in Sunshine. Finishing almost all of Goopy Inferno after several tries and then having Mario clip through the ceiling forcing you to restart the level is brutal. It's especially terrible because, judging by his controls, Mario seems to have developed a predilection for meth on his vacation. He accelerates SO fast while simultaneously sliding a little more than you would expect. The result is a less precise and sloppier Mario. Add to that mixture a solid portion of levels that require pretty precise platforming for extended periods with no checkpoints and you have a piña colada with an extra shot of frustration. And you know what? I lowkey loved it. There's a mastery here to controlling Meth Mario. The first time I was on one of those spinning cubes floating over the vast abyss of a secret level and I tapped the analog stick a micrometer too far and Mario hurtled off the edge like he got hit by a cattle-prod I was furious. And then death after death I honed in on how to wrangle our yacked-out plumber and the challenge became fun. Sure there's still some straight bulllshit like the red coin Blooper surfing one where you have to get 8 red coins without hitting anything or you not only die but are kicked out of the level. That's not the bad part. The bad part is I got all 8 coins thinking I was done and then the game is like "Ok, go get the Shine [evil smile]" and the Shine is on a dock. If you hit the dock you lose. And are booted out of the level to do the whole thing over again. Guess who hit the dock? Bullshit. Oh and of course Satan's own minions, the Chucksters. Though to be honest I think it's insanely funny that one level is just a fucked up guessing game of trying to precisely rotate Mario within a degree or two or you're brutally murdered by a Chuckster and have to start over. And I haven't even talked about the FLUDD which I think controls like a dream and adds a whole layer of fun to Meth Mario's controls. Nevermind the levels where you just have to spray shit down absolutely tapping into my latent ADHD. Or oh man the level where you're just on a roller coaster shooting rockets at a giant Mecha Bowser. Are you kidding??

I'm actually stoked that I'm a Sunshine fan especially because I low-key hated large portions of 64, a game that everyone loves. I thought since people like Sunshine way less I'd hate it. But here I was ruining Bowser's vacation and loving every minute of it.